Wafting the over-sized checks under the noses of homeless bums and students at work-study, the owner rejoiced in his achievement.  “See this?” he asked one poverty-stricken individual.  “This is why I’m on the top and you’re on the bottom!”  He then performed a couple bell-hops while whistling the tune of “Teen Wolf”.

Apparently, HappyEmbryo.com’s owner never realized just how good he was.  Always playing second fiddle to the likes of this page, he had always been shamed by the crappy, crappy writing that has become so popular on the internet.  Of course, he never knew how crappy they were until he realized how great he was.

	A Webfest contender graciously admits defeat to HappyEmbryo.com

His jubilee was most apparent in his carefully tendered web-log.  As the creator wrote in it the trials and tribulations of that day that resulted in his glorious and satisfying win, other contestants had to excuse themselves of their failure.  The following was discovered at Café Brando (http://cafebrando.blogspot.com/)

Friday, March 26, 2004
I Coulda Been Somebody...I Coulda Been a Contender! 
Today I participated in USC's "Webfest," the third annual symposium for internet-based projects, which this year allowed blogs into its midst.
…
Indeed I didn't win any awards in the blog categories, though I'm fairly certain I was the close fourth place, if only they had announced past third.

However, here is one guy's blog that beat me. His presentation was horrifying, and I'm a little crushed that the judges thought his story about a guy who tries to lift heavy weights and ends up with his forearms torn off and tendons danging out of his "elbow pits" (?) is better than, say, anything on my blog. But after his presentation, T observed that it's better not to have won anything at this symposium than to have won [Ed. note: except for the prestige and tons of money], and I'm inclined to agree -- having to share the podium with that guy would certainly have tarnished my character in some way...
Posted by: Brando / 10:34 PM

The owner of HappyEmbryo.com would like his clients to know that they can expect more money-winning content in the near future.  He also recommends that they click on the advertisements generously distributed throughout his website to help his cause.

Comments

Ridicule! Written by Guest on 2004-03-27 20:25:57 Ridiculous!    It's absolutely ridiculous that they wanted Connery for Never Say Never Again, when I'm the one who never says never.    Your pal,    G. Laz

And what was wrong w/ the LIES article? Written by Guest on 2004-03-27 20:35:36 What was wrong with this this piece? I liked it. I don't think I'd have bothered to debunk those Truth space cadets, but hey, someone's gotta do it - and it might as well be a COLUMBIAN. Or a Columbite, whatever they call themselves.    Just a Buckeye, who's ostensibly very busy,     "The Laz"

HEY DOUG Written by Guest on 2004-03-28 17:05:14 HEY DOUG HOW COME HAPPY EMBRYO LOOKS SUSPICIOUSLY LIKE THE SAD SACK OF ZYRTEC ONLY NOT DEPRESSED AND TALLER

Daddy Written by Guest on 2004-03-29 05:06:44 Please be a bit more discrete with your home page. Offensive gestures and explicit references to straight sex are offensive to persons over 40.  Your friend,  Anonymous

The truth Written by admin on 2004-03-31 17:58:39 Some people have approached this article incredulously, but I assure you it's all real. We really won several hundred dollars for our efforts. HappyEmbryo.com not so crappy now, is it?     ...you're right, it is.

eew straight sex Written by Guest on 2004-04-01 01:55:30 straight sex is for sad sax    George L. Pwns

hahahah Written by Guest on 2004-04-01 22:59:55 that was great! woah...i almost pissed in my pants!    ...close call!

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